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Years before Ciara became many fans “relationship goals” with Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson, she was in a relationship with rapper Future in which the two conceived a child together.
The two broke their engagement in 2015, following rumors that he was cheating, and things got ugly as their breakup was magnified through comments and social media posts.
She looked back at that time of her life, and meeting what turned out to be the man of her dreams during the most recent episode of Red Table Talk.
Ciara admitted to crying a lot following the break up, not only because the relationship was over, but because she felt for what her son would have to go through.
“I’d have moments when I would be in the shower, I’d be crying. I had a few different settings — crying in the bedroom, crying in the shower … crying because I’m not in the happiest place, and it hurts what I’m going through,” she said. “It was a combination of everything because none of it was ideal. I grew up with my mom and dad being together, the idea of it being, ‘Mommy and Daddy made baby,’ then all of a sudden you’re living your life in front of the world. That adds a whole other layer. ‘I feel like I’m failing right now. Other people, they’re gonna roast me. Here they come in the comment section. I’m about to get fried.’”
She then spoke on her breakthrough moment.
“I remember one time I was working out on the elliptical machine, and I was just not sure about, ‘Do I stay or what direction do I go? What’s the right thing to do? It’s easy to do this, but is the easy thing the right thing?’”
The singer later later recounted on the connection she made with Russell Wilson, and how the two relationships differ.
“I had never had that feeling in my life. It was just, like, calm,” she said. “We were connecting in every way. … His conversation, it was just different. The way that he looked at life was different. Also, the energy with my son, it just felt right. And of course, the consistency. He’s consistent. That consistency is so crucial. He was like, ‘I got you.’ Just the detail. Whenever he would think about me, he would think about my son. And to love me is to love my son. We come together. It’s dope. It’s a different level of love.”
Watch the full episode below.